As far as I can see back, Christmas was a painful reminder that I am alone.
I always wanted to go home… home was a place where I longed to be, but I had no idea what that would be like. Surely where I lived wasn’t home. Surely the people I was with left me feeling alone.
Later, relationship made my life busy, but I still felt alone. Not envying others, not something wrong, just alone. Like you are on the top of a mountain, and no one to share the experience with.
There have been several awakenings in my life.
The first potential awakening was when I was 22 years old. I had been in the mental hospital for two weeks and my condition didn’t get better, no matter what they did to me. They even tried to use insulin shock therapy on me… that’s really bad, if you want to know the truth.
Then, as a last resort, they sent me to the “showers” that you should know from the Cuckoo’s nest movie… halfway though the “showers” I snapped out of it. There I was stark naked, and the misery wasn’t me, it wasn’t even mine.
>What’s missing that ALL self-improvement, self-development products end up on the “fraud” pile that is as high as mount Everest?
Ultimately there are two types of teachers:
Can do (occasionally) what they teach, but unaware and unconscious of what they are doing
Can’t even do what they teach, but expect you to do it regardless
Beliefs are thought forms. Words. Mind-stuff.
The Universe is holographic. Holographic, among others, means that the patterns repeat in big and small things alike. ((Although the whole looks quite chaotic, because cause and effect is hardly detectable, because of the size of the system (the whole Universe), if we had enough distance from the system, we would find patterns that are repeating… which is the nature of fractals and holographs.
Now, I am certain that the sentence above didn’t make sense to most, for the sake of the very few that can appreciate it, I needed to say it.))
One of the patterns is the tree-like diagram of root-stem-fruit. We’ll examine that pattern in this article
The roots are hidden in the soil. The stem looks the same for most trees. And then the fruit is very specific.
Most self-improvement systems are busy improving the fruit without
I wonder if you ever pondered where nightmares like most Doctor Who stories are, come from?
My hunch is that they come from reality.
Take the story where humans, one by one, by touch, are turned into human-size grinning or weeping toys. And now that they are toys with no will of their own, the only will they have is to turn other humans into toys like themselves.
When I look around I see plenty of proof of this nightmare being real.
Make a list of areas where wanting, your wanting dominates the situation. Where you are in the situation purely or mostly because you want something.
What can you want? What do you want? How to find it? Look for where you want
love?
attention?
friendship?
sex?
money?
Yesterday I had a marathon call with a student. It went almost three hours.
She paid for 15 minutes… and we only ended it after almost three hours, because she needed to use the bathroom and walk the dog… I was still ready to continue.
What made we want to talk to her this long?
The answer is obvious to me, but maybe not that obvious to you, so let me explain.
In every conversation you have the opportunity to observe yourself, and catch yourself in some machine-like reaction. Every time it’s a gift.
Go read the rest of the article http://www.yourvibration.com/14334/self-awareness-part-2/
What is self-awareness? Is it feeling what you feel, thinking what you think, doing what you do, and knowing you are doing, feeling, thinking that?
I think self-awareness is beyond that, self-awareness is a positional shift for the self that is aware. Positional meant in a physical sense, in a physical movement of the vantage point.
It is one thing to feel from inside the body, and it’s another thing from observing it, as the body feels what it feels.
If there are words to the feeling, then it is the Mind that is attempting to label the experience… but your Self is NOT your mind, it is not even near your mind. You also, the moment your mind labels the experience, stop feeling, and now consider the word as the experience, instead… Much like eating the menu in a restaurant, not the meal. I have watched people doing that…
Go read the rest
The package, big like a tomb stone, arrived this week. I wish they had it on Kindle… but I guess they want to control every step of the sales process. Hm. Interesting.
The package is two books, both big and thick. The first: Creating a bug free mind, and the second: using a bug free mind. Ultimately the idea of this two step process that made me use Andy Shaw’s book as an experiment: everyone stops at teaching, no one seems to continue into the troubles of actually teaching you how to use, and guiding you in using what they taught. ((… and even when they make some weak attempt, they hire volunteers to do the guidance, to do the coaching, and never check if those volunteers have ever done the work. Landmark’s Self Expression and Leadership program is example for that. Only about 2% of the people actually do a successful project, the once that would have probably done it successfully wi
Freedom versus Liberty, thrivers, survivors, or fallen by the wayside
When I ask people what they want, many say they want freedom. When we poke into it: they want a sense of freedom, but think the way to get to freedom is through liberty… Let me explain.
Just like with all words we use, here is huge confusion, a collapse of two distinctions: freedom and liberty. They are not connected. They don’t even overlap!
Go read the rest of the article http://www.yourvibration.com/14154/freedom-liberty/